Monday, April 24, 2006

Observations from the Home Front

I've been home sick for about a week now. Can't get much writing done, or really spend a lot of time on the computer because I'm in too much pain. But...the mind is still fairly sharp and I've noticed a few things in the last coupla days.

1. It's official. I now know my husband half his life. Yesterday was dh's birthday. The day didn't go the way I would have liked thanks to my current condition, and I know he was disappointed. Still, I vow here and now to make it up to him as soon as whatever I've got eases. I'm not sure he realizes how much he means to me. Philip is my best friend, the person who can usually make me laugh when I'm feeling so low I can't look down, and the inspiration for every word I write. I can't picture my life without him in it. It would be like living without my heart, like moving thru life as a spectator, existing but not really living. So, yeah, hon, I owe you one. (And don't tell me it doesn't matter, 'cuz it does!)

2. My cat, Miss Savannah (a new addition to the family) has a foot fetish. Not shoes or socks. Feet. Walk around barefoot and Miss Savannah rubs her head against your heels, your toes, what-have-you. She won't let you pet her head, but you can dig your toes into her scalp and she's in heaven. I'm not sure what it means except, as my husband puts it, "She's one twisted cat."

3. My son doesn't know what an ashtray is. I think that says a lot about the shift in attitudes regarding smoking. When I was growing up, every house had an ashtray on every table. Twenty years ago, when a good friend of mine would visit my apartment (Hi, Ro!), she'd constantly complain that I had no ashtrays. I still don't have any--only now, it's not so much of a rarity and is more the norm for households. Thank God.

4. An 84 year-old woman won ten million dollars in Atlantic City last week. See the link here. What I find so amazing about this plucky grandma is that, as of the writing of the article, she hadn't decided whether to take a lump sum payout or monthly annuities over 25 years. Hello? She's 84. In 25 years, she'll be 109! Gotta love that kind of optimism.

5. I am very lucky in my friends and family. Yes, I always believed that, but being sick and in a period of things-that-can-go-wrong-will, I'm more aware than ever of the wonderful support staff surrounding me. Some have offered me an organ if needed (thanks, Missy!), some have stepped in to help (thanks, Deb!) and others have called or emailed to track my progress, offer cyberhugs, and let me know how much I'm loved (too many to mention here, but you know who you are, so thank you all!)

I have to call a specialist today to see if they can come up with a clearcut diagnosis for what I've got. Am I nervous? A little, but I know with all the wonderful people around me, I'll get thru.

Thanks for reading!